A number of years ago, a guy at work decided to gift his 16-year-old idiot son a BMW for his birthday. I thought that was a really really bad idea.

But he gave him the gift anyway. Within minutes, the idiot kid wrapped the car around a pole.

For some odd reason, that story came to mind last night after the first inning of the Rangers game, in which they were gifted five first-inning runs.

Then, within minutes, Andrew Heaney got behind the wheel. He immediately gave up two runs in the top of the second to match the two he had given up in the top of the first. Then, in the fourth inning, he got two outs but also hit a batter and walked a batter, both of which scored.

In 3.2 innings, Heaney gave up six runs, totally destroying the five-run gift the Rangers were given in the first inning. It’s a reminder that Heaney lost his rotation slot at the end of 2023. And, one would imagine, will lose his rotation slot once Michael Lorenzen is ready to go. Or, most certainly, once Scherzer is ready.

But last night’s folly was embarrassing. Any momentum the Rangers might have built up from beating the Astros the first two games of this four-gamer is gone. Any swagger is gone. Any hope of burying the Astros early is gone. Any thought that this might be the year the Astros stumble is gone.

The Rangers scored seventeen runs off Houston pitching in the first two games, and one in the second two.

Yes, they got a five-run first. But that was off a minor leaguer, not an actual Astro.

Besides, the Rangers were given a gift of that five-run first inning. Andrew Heaney wrapped it around a pole.

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