Where are the bats?

For a brief shining moment the men in white had a 3-0 lead, but lost 8-3.

Dear Jon Daniels:

I would like to inquire about the apparent opening in your front office for the role of equipment manager.

It appears you are in urgent need of someone to fill that position. Have you been aware that the last three road trips your Texas Rangers baseball team has taken, the team’s bats have failed to have been transported from Arlington to the visiting ballparks? The team shows up and subsequently has nothing to hit with.

For instance, last night in Chicago, the team struck out 13 times and managed just four hits and three runs. The night before, also in Chicago, they managed just three hits and one run, and struck out ten times. This, against a White Sox team whose pitching is nearly (not quite, though) as bad as your team’s pitching. Meaning, it’s very very hittable. If only you had an equipment manager who remembered to load the bats into the semis. He did remember the new uniforms, though. The ones that make your players look like they’re selling ice cream. You can’t blame the players for wanting to get out of those as quickly as possible.

But, back to the bat delivery oversight. This isn’t the first time this has happened, Mr. Daniels. The last time the Rangers scored just two runs when they went to Cleveland for three days, and just eight runs in three games in Milwaukee. It wasn’t much better in Toronto, but I am sure international laws get in the way. With the exchange rate, your two losses there are probably only one US loss.

Not to tell tales on anyone, Jon, but this has been going on for quite some time. Your team is 25-40 on the road. That is considered “not good.”

I have an idea: Maybe have the players bring their bats with them on the plane. I am sure TSA will let them through security once they look at box scores from their road games. They will realize they are not weapons. Have TSA call opposing managers for confirmation on that.

Oh, and while you are filling the position of equipment manager, you might want to take a look at some resumés for pitching developers too. You may not be aware of it, but that guy’s been slacking off this entire time.


Kevin Sutton, fan. 



Kolby Allard (1-0, 6.60) vs. Ivan Nova (9-9, 4.47)

Game time: 6:10